Here We Go Again!

Day 3 of this cycle & I just popped my first Femara pill in over a year & a half. I am not looking forward to this trying to get pregnant process again. This will be our 2nd (sort of 3rd) month of trying. The 1st month we really only had sex once, so I can't really count that month, but last month we actively tried and no baby, just my extremly heavy period. I was pretty disappointed on Thursday night when I knew I was starting my period. I didn't think it would happen that fast, but I was so hopeful. I REALLY didn't want to have to stress & worry like before.

I can't forget the fact that I have a beautiful little girl that is the light of my life & I am SO thankful for. But I can't help to want more. I have always wanted a huge family and so I hope that someday I have that.

It was so weird that in the months before we started trying I was SO not ready to have another baby or to be pregnant. But now that I am ready, I feel like I am not only ready to be pregnant, but actually ready to have the baby here now. God, I am really impatient. If I get pregnant this month then our baby will be due at the end of July. I learned from my first pregnancy that you don't get to plan when your baby is due, however, I really wanted a summer baby this time. I really wanted to be on maternity leave over the summer & I really wanted our babies to be 18 months apart. Right now I can still get a couple of those wants, but I feel like w/ each day I am running out of time. And again, I will take a baby whenever, but you can't help to have those superficial wants.

I have only told my best friend that I am actively trying right now, so a couple people (that see me on a regular basis) might find out now, but oh well.

Thanks for letting me rant. I hope everyone is doing okay out there. Sorry it has been so long. We have had an extremely busy summer & fall. We are doing great. Connelly is getting so big. She has 8 teeth, she crawls, pulls up, stands (even though I haven't really seen this yet), and finally says "mama!" She is my everything and I thank god everyday for her. I attached a recent photo of her.

I will be back b/c I want to share this journey with you all again!

Beth