Just a few more days.

God this waiting sucks, but luckily w/ the short week last week & long weekend, that helped. Only 3 more days until my next u/s. I am praying that the baby grew & we will see a little beating heart:) I really hope so. I am a little more positive than last week. I am still feeling uneasy every once in a while, but not often. Other than that that is really my only symptom besides not starting my period. My stomach is growing though. My pants are alot tighter than they were 2 weeks ago & right after I eat, my stomach feels huge (to me). I hope everything is going okay w/ the lil' one.

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving, I did:) Not looking forward to paying the bills though after my Black Friday shopping. LOL!

Keep your fingers crossed & thanks for thinking of me!
Beth

Now I'm Nervous

So when I got to my appt. this morning I found out they were going to do an u/s. I was already a bit upset b/c I knew Jeremy wouldn't be able to make it, but he said to go ahead w/ it & so I did. As the RE was doing the u/s, he found the gestational sac right away & again on my right side, so so much for that side being blocked. There was only one. He didn't see a yolk sac though. I got extremely nervous. At the end he did end up seeing the yolk sac & showed me, but I am still freaking out. He thinks I conceived the 1st week in November & he said he looked like a 5 week pregnancy. However, I had my u/s w/ Connelly at 5 1/2 weeks & I remember her being very positive, seeing the yolk sac, but I can't remember if there was more or not. I kind of wish the NP would have done it instead of the RE, sometimes it is just better to have a woman b/c that have been in our shoes. He seemed pretty positive & said to still come back next Thursday and he hopes to see the baby & heartbeat then. He said that if we see the same thing next week, then I had a blighted ovum. I don't want a fucking blighted ovum! I want a baby. I am pretty scared now. I am just going to keeping praying that everything goes okay and that this baby was just conceived after we thought & so everything is good to go. Please pray for me:)

Beth

I Gotta Have Faith

Today is a much better day than yesterday. I am feeling much more positive. I forgot how much of a rollercoaster this is. I am looking forward to going to the doctor tomorrow & hoping for the best. I am so glad that today is my "Thursday" and the day is almost half way over. It will be SO nice to have a 5 day weekend and it doesn't hurt that I LOVE Thanksgiving & BLACK FRIDAY! I can't wait to get all the good deals:)

Not feeling so sure

I am just trying to stay positive but it is SO hard when you have had a miscarriage in the past. Plus I am not feeling some of the symptoms that I feel I should. My boobs are not sore AT ALL. I thought they were supposed to be at this point, so why aren't they. I have felt a little uneasy some days, but for the majority I feel 100% normal, as normal as I did on all the days I wasn't pregnant. I just don't know how I am going to wait until next Thursday for the u/s. I am thinking about calling the doctor today to see if I can come in sooner either for the u/s or at least for more bloodwork to make sure my numbers are still going up. I am just really scared & hope that everything is okay!!!


UPDATED****

I called the doctor & asked to come in this week for more bloodwork to help put my mind at ease. I was hoping to go in tomorrow, but they said Wednesday, so now I can't wait for that day to get here. I have been cramping alot today, so that worries me even though I know some cramping is normal. I tried to go back & read my posts from the beginning of my pregnancy w/ Connelly to see how this one compared, but it is so hard. I know I had cramping then too, but don't know if it was the same time b/c I would have just found out I was pregnant either today or sometime this week for that pregnancy, so it is a little different. I just hope everything is okay!!!

Why does everything have to be SO complicated???

Well, I managed to piss off Jeremy last night. We originally said we would tell his family first b/c we told mine first last time. Well my family is so complicated. I have 4 sisters, one of which has been trying to get pregnant for over 4 years & yesterday was her birthday. So anyways, my younger sister & I are the closest, she has always told me first when she is pregnant, so I thought I had to do her the honor too, plus Jeremy told me he had spilled the beans to her ex-husband (who are recently divorced, judge is signing off on the papers next week). And I wanted my mom to know, plus I feel like my mom is semi-sensitive so I felt like she might get her feelings hurt if I waited any longer, which she then told my dad. And we needed to borrow a "big sis" shirt from another sister in order to tell Jeremy's fam the way we wanted. AND I couldn't hold the secret back from my best friend any longer so I told her. So Jeremy only knew that I told two of my sisters & was annoyed, I didn't have the heart to tell him that my mom, dad & best friend all knew now too. I just wish it was as easy to tell my fam as his, or maybe it's me, that I put so much worry in what everyone is thinking that if I just sat back & relaxed no one would really care. I am always worrying about everyone's feelings though. I told Jeremy that next time we are just calling his freaking parents the second we find out to tell them, so I don't have to feel bad about telling anyone else. We just really wanted to surprise his parents in a neat way, and to do that you have to wait until the right moment, but in the mean time, I am so excited and can't keep my mouth shut:( I hope he isn't too disappointed, I do feel bad we didn't do it the way he wanted.

So we are leaving tonight to go to the lake w/ his fam & I CAN'T WAIT FOR THEM TO KNOW!!!

I really hope everything is going okay inside me. I just pray that this pregnancy sticks!!!

I do already feel very bloated. Jeremy said its all in my head that my stomach doesn't get bigger in 3 days, but I feel that way. Or maybe since I know I am pregnant, I don't suck in anymore, but I am telling you, my stomach feels bigger. It must be in my head:)

Have a good weekend!
Beth

Beta TRIPLED!!!

Yikes. What does that mean. It is now 1134. The NP said she is a little curious now to if there is more than one in there. Our u/s is scheduled for December 3rd, how am I EVER going to wait that long??? I want to see the little guy(s)/girl(s) NOW!!! I am SO excited & can't believe it.

More bloodwork

Just got back awhile ago from the doctor's office. I built up the courage to ask what my beta was on Tuesday and she said 378. She said that it was a great number b/c I would have been at 4 weeks & 3 days on Tuesday. The NP even said that she was curious if there was more than one follicle that had been released or if we just had a strong singleton. I was able to relax a bit after this. I should find out today about 2pm what todays beta was. I am SO hoping that my numbers doubled. Keep your fingers crossed!

I'll let you know once I find out.

Thanks for listening!
Beth

I think the drugs worked:)

Sunday was day 29 of my cycle. For the past couple months I have been having light spotting for about 2 days before I start my period so that is what I was expecting Friday & Saturday and nothing. I was supposed to start my period on Sunday & nothing. I was freaking out b/c I figured that my luck the Femara I took was probably making my cycle longer & that I was going to start my period and be so upset. This month was so different from other months. I was SO relaxed and just happy, no matter what happened. That is until Sunday, when I was just so anxious & SO scared. I slept about 2-1/2 hours on Sunday night b/c all I could think about was "am I pregnant???" On Monday night I bought a pregnancy test. W/in seconds of taking it, it was positive. I AM PREGNANT!!! I have NEVER seen a positive result on a pregnancy test, it was SO exciting. Last time I found out I was pregnant was through an ultrasound at 5-1/2 weeks b/c I couldn't figure out why I wasn't starting my period b/c I was told I couldn't get pregnant that month. The time before that was over the phone after bloodwork only to find out 2 days later I had miscarried. I am SOOOOOO scared that this pregnancy isn't going to stick. I got my blood done yesterday and the doctor said my beta was good, but she wasn't offering up the number & I was scared to ask so I didn't. I go again tomorrow & I HOPE that my numbers at least double. We want this so badly. What a nice Christmas gift early. I just want to be able to tell our family this weekend our exciting news, it would be so amazing. I can't think about anything else right now, I am just freaking out about this. I am praying so hard that I am able to keep this pregnancy & that we will have a little baby at the end of July!!!

Thanks for listening:) And if you know me personally PLEASE do not pass on this information. We really would not like anyone to know until we feel more comfortable with this.

Beth