Bean is still alive & kicking:)

So we went in for the u/s today & at first I couldn't see a heart beating, so I was a little freaked out, but I had thought I had seen the baby moving. But then the sonographer moved the thing around a bit & we were able to see the heart beating away at 162. I am SO relieved that Bean is doing okay. She said that there was just a small nick in a vesicle I believe and there was still some fluid (blood) in there, so she said I still could have some bleeding or spotting, but I am hoping not. She thought the baby looked great though. She seemed pretty confused that the ER doc wouldn't do an u/s or didn't try the doppler. I am going to ask my OB about it tomorrow, they have set an appt. up for me to see him tomorrow. Thank you for all your thoughts & prayers.

Beth

We may have lost the baby:(

Yesterday while walking around Costco I felt my underwear fill and so I rushed to the bathroom praying I wasn't spotting again and was in no way ready for what I saw. My underwear was soaking w/ red blood. I was completely freaked out. I called the doctor and he told me to lay down and if the bleeding didn't stop that I would need to go to the ER. Well it didn't stop so we finally headed that way around 5pm. We were there for a few hours. The doctor said that the mouth of my uterus is still closed so I hadn't miscarried yet. He was very hopeful, to where he said that 90% of the time everything will be fine & even said "congratulations" which I thought was a little weird. They wouldn't do an u/s though b/c he said they would only do that if they were scared of an eptopic pregnancy or if I needed surgery right them, so that was pretty disappointing. So Jeremy & I have just been in limbo not really sure to be positive or prepare ourselves for the worst. We will be at the doctor's office tomorrow at 9am when they open. I will keep you posted. I was still bleeding late last night & this morning. But as of now it is brown blood no more red.

Please keep me in your prayers!
Beth

Ready for the Weekend

It is hard to work 5 days in a row when you haven't done that in at least 3 weeks. It sucks!!! Anyway, glad the day is over half way over, & really for the past couple hours I was just out running errands. It is snowing again!!! I feel like it has been snowing for 3 weeks, b/c it kind of has.

I have such a busy weekend, this weekend. My house is such a mess, so that is one thing on the to do list. I was thinking about it the other night & realized if I walked in to anyone's house that looked like mine I would be horrified, that is how bad it is. I really need to do laundry too. And I am co-hosting 2 baby showers this weekend, so that is going to keep me busy too.

Just finished "The Lovely Bones" last night. And would STRONLY recommend it to EVERYONE. I read it in 4 days, it was awesome. A few parts were slow, but the rest of it was so good, that they few parts barely slowed me down. The first couple chapters were sad, the book is about a young girl being murdered & it is her story of what happened and how she watched over her family afterwards. It is actually going to be a movie & comes out in a few months I think. Read it, you'll love it, I promise!!!

Have a great weekend!

200 Days to Go!

Feeling good today, a little nauseous, so don't really know about that, but whatev. I went back to May 2008 to read the posts from the same period of the pregnancy w/ Connelly & it is funny to see the differences and similarities. At 10 weeks I talked about how badly my boobs hurt, and yet today they still haven't hurt at all w/ this pregnancy. Weird. Anyways, hoping that Bean is doing good (at least I know he/she was yesterday). And talking about he/she, I think I am going to just use he. I more than anything want a healthy child, however, I would love to have another daughter this time around b/c I want Connelly to have what I do. I am 18 months older than my younger sister and we have always been very close & I would love for Connelly to have that too. So I figure if I call Bean a he this whole time I am preparing myself for a boy, so I will be excited and ready for a little boy to come home w/ me (since we aren't finding out), but then if Bean is a girl & I will be pleasantly surprised. Either way I win, no matter what, but this way I am prepared for either. And again, please don't be offended by this, my #1 goal is to have a healthy baby, but let's be honest here, if we are asking me to choose, for this pregnancy I would choose a little girl over the boy. Ask me again if we are lucky to have more kids in the future and my answer will be the opposite b/c I want at least one little boy b/c I just do & I know Jeremy would love to have a little guy!!!

Anyways, my sister & her husband went in to my RE today for their 1st consultation. They have been TTC for 4 1/2 years now. They unexpectedly found out they were pregnant the day before Connelly was born, however, they miscarried around New Year's last year. I just feel so badly for them. She has a 13 year son from her previous marriage, but they so badly want a baby. Also they are VERY broke. Her ex-husband or "shit for brains" as we like to call him (but of course not around my nephew) is such an awful person, he owes her I think around 40 GRAND in back child support. They struggle each month to pay their bills and yet the courts see visitation and child support as different things and so her ex still gets to see her son. God he is such an ass. I can't wait for the day for my nephew to realize how much his dad sucks, even though, I think that will be very painful for him, so then again, I just don't know. Anyways, they aren't going to be able to afford to do much as far as ART goes, but I hope that maybe that can at least afford fertility drugs & maybe IUI eventually. I just wish she could win the lottery so they could do IVF or something. She is in law school right now, so within the next 5 years, I am hoping that their lives will be greatly improved financially after she begins working. I am just so proud of her for going back to school after all this time and she has been through so much. So anyways, if you could all please keep her family in your prayers and send good baby making vibes their way, they REALLY need them. I know it is hard for her that I am pregnant, that is actually what finally sent her to my RE. She said she couldn't take one more person getting pregnant w/o trying something, so they saved some of their Christmas money for this.

Alright, I will stop rambling now. Hope you are all have a great day!

Doing MUCH better!

I am feeling a ton better today & the u/s went good. Baby is doing good, the heartbeat was 167, so glad that Bean is okay!!! Thanks for your well wishes!!!

MISERABLE!

I have been up since 4:30am throwing up. I feel miserable!!! My back is absolutely killing me along w/ my stomach. I have barely been able to eat anything. I don't think that this is related to the brown discharge I have been having but not happy that I am dealing w/ either. God I hope I feel better soon!

Pretty Much Freaking Out!

So last night as I was out of town at my friend's house I started to feel wetness in my undies so I went straight to the bathroom & found brown discharge to my surprise. When I went to wipe there was a lot of brown discharge. It took me about three different wads of tp to wipe everything, I was horrified. I called for Jeremy into the bathroom, but he didn't really know what to say. I went straight into the bedroom and starting bawling and called the doctor. Luckily the on-call doctor didn't seem worried at all, but I still am. She told me that many different things in the first trimester can cause bleeding internally which them sometimes the blood pools inside and leaks out later and that maybe the doctor disrupted that during his internal exam. She said I could come in Monday morning for an u/s so I would be reassured I was okay. That made me feel a little better however ALL day today I have been cramping. I haven't had anymore of the brown discharge, but still w/ the cramps I am just a wreck. I am so freaked now that I may beginning to miscarry. I really need your good thoughts, prayers & vibes sent my way. I am just praying like crazy right now & hoping Bean can stick around!