Saturday Catastrophe

So this weekend was just okay. Friday night we went over to Jeremy's brother's house so Jeremy could help him hang crown molding. They made us dinner & we went home after that. Saturday we went to my nephew's wrestling tournament (he got third & will be going to state:)), we went & saw my friend's baby, and then we went downtown to participate in all the Big 12 Tournament buzz. All were good times.

After that we met up w/ some friend's by our house & then I decided to meet my little sister out with her friends. I was having a good time, but a little uncomfortable b/c a bunch of girls that I didn't really get along w/ in high school were there. It isn't that we are cordial now, but still a bit uncomfortable. Then I see one of them is early into her pregnancy. I know I shouldn't be bitter, but I was. She is this perfect little being w/ a very attractive husband, they just got married & now she is cute & pregnant. I know I have all those things besides the pregnancy, but I still couldn't help but feel jealous. After one more drink & feeling even more uncomfortable, I started texting Jeremy & telling him that I was a bit sad & wished he were with me. Well this went on for about a half hour. I then saw a guy I went to college with & actually went to high school with his wife (I liked her), she wasn't there so I asked how she was. He preceded to tell me that she was home pregnant. Are you fucking kidding me!!! I swear the whole world is having babies right now except for me (and some of you all)!!! That was my breaking point. I then texted Jeremy that I wanted to go home & cry, when he texted back, "Do what you gotta do, I will see you after 2:30am," mind you, it was probably only 10:30pm at this time, I was extremely upset!!! I pretty much told him to fuck off & that I would be at my parents. He then felt awful, b/c he wasn't trying to be rude in his text, but it did come off that way.

When I got to my parents, I was pretty upset. I talked with my mom for about an hour or so. She helped to calm me down, but sometimes her comments are too motherly. Whenever I am upset about this she always tells me that I need to get involved & that I need to start going to church & that how can I ask for so many favors of God if I am not willing to sacrifice for him. I believe her in all her statements, however, that is not really what I am looking for when I am having that kind of a pity party. I want to feel sorry for myself & I want her to to. I do feel like I should get involved & I do feel like I should start going to church, but I don't believe that God is punishing me b/c I am not either. I know she is just trying to help, but sometimes I wish that she would just hug me & cry w/ me.

So I finally decided to go home & Jeremy said he would meet me there. He apologized & I know that he wasn't meaning to be mean, and that he just didn't really know what to say. He is so super supportive all the time, that I know he would never intentionally hurt me like I felt.

So anyway that was my Saturday night catastrophe!!! One funny story about the night is that this lady sat down next to us at our table. She started talking to one of the girl's moms. We all decided that no one knew who she was, but she thought she was part of our group. My sister had bought food earlier in the evening and they hadn't finished the "blooming onion" (not the real name, but like that) appetizer. We looked over and she was eating off the appetizer. My sister was like, "is she eating my food?" We all laughed, I pushed it towards my sister, but she said she didn't want it after the random ate from it. A couple minutes later, after she had helped herself to quite a bit of it, she had asked for a box & put it in a to-go box to take home with her. None of us could believe it. We all were laughing so hard at her & she had no idea. She then took a sip of the friend's moms drink. We had included the waitress on what was going on, so when the random wasn't looking, the waitress threw away the to-go box w/ the food in it. The lady kept asking us, "who took my food?" We all wanted to be like, "No, bitch that was not your food." It was hilarious, it definitely lightened the mood a bit.

Okay so I go for my u/s soon. I am so nervous. I think some of the Saturday night deal was b/c of how nervous I am. I will let you know when I get back.

Wish me luck!!!
Beth

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So I feel like I am going to throw up. I am so nervous. I can barely stand it. I don't know how I am going to make it through the next couple hours. I really hope I get good news today.

B